Supporting you through the scholarship decision

This guide provides some support to help you and your child prepare for the next step when you receive the news that you will not be progressing further at your academy. It will be disheartening and upsetting for your child and your family, but things can turn with a few helpful tips in your back pocket. Remember, this is just another step in the football journey; at some point, whether as a 16 or 25-year-old, you will leave a club. In this clip, Chris Thurston, a former Player Care Manager at Arsenal, shares his view on leaving a club.

Preparing for the Decision

1. Start Conversations Early 

Discuss “retain and release” as a part of the process, not something to be feared. Rotation through academies often leads to new, beneficial opportunities, not just setbacks. Talk to your child about what they would think and feel if, at some point, they were facing the end of the contract. Ask them what they might want to do – look for a new club, try a new sport, focus on a different career. Help them see what they are gaining in this academy experience, that you are proud of their hard work and commitment and that you have a positive outlook for the future, whether at the club or elsewhere 

2. Ask the Right Questions  

3. Communicate Openly with Coaches and Clubs 

Clubs handle release differently, some have review meetings and share decisions others will communicate by phone or email and ask for you to take time to process the decision before meeting with you and your child. This is a difficult time for everyone and it is not something the coaches and other staff will enjoy doing and they may not always get it right. Approach the situation with respect to maintain support and potential relationships. 

Impact of the Decision on Your Child 

1. Understanding the Emotional Toll 

  A child receiving a decision that they will be leaving a football club can trigger emotions of rejection, loss, and frustration. Your child may struggle with their identity and friendships and even face questions and teasing from school friends and others. Recognise that their emotions can vary from day to day, they may make snap decisions in the moment that they reflect on with time and feel differently about. Give them space and time to process 

2. Support Their Next Steps Based on Individual Needs 

 Some players want to return to their normal pattern of training at the club, while others might need time away. Listen to your child and validate their feelings as they navigate these emotions. Don’t try and force them to do anything the don’t want to, help them explore what the pros and cons are of different decisions. 

Tips for Supporting Your Child 

Set Realistic Expectations: Wherever you are in the journey support your child to understand the reality of the football industry and the competitive process. Even if your child is secure and will have the contract extended, encourage them to have empathy for others and help them recognise that there will come a time where they will face difficult decisions, rejection whether at pro level, in a first team, going on loan, moving clubs. 

Validate Emotions: Recognise their feelings and reassure them that this is about them and not about proving things to others or letting anyone down. Provide space for them to process things don’t add pressure on any decisions until they have had time to think things through. 

Identify Signs of Distress: Depending on their expectations and the pressure from others a decision by a club not to extend a contract can have a devastating impact on some children. If you see signs of distress in your child that worry you reach out for professional support – the club may be able to offer psychological support but you may want to look outside 

Role Model Resilience: In difficult times children look to the adults around them for security and stability. It is really important that you demonstrate that you are coping with the decision and that you can be optimistic about the future. This will help you child feel secure and more able to cope with the setbacks. For a child to see a parent in a highly emotional state or in distress can be very traumatising for them. Find your own support to process the impact of any decision so you can be a better support for your child. 

The reality of football mirrors other areas like job hunting, buying a home, or even relationships, where facing and moving past rejection is essential. By showing resilience, you help your child learn to do the same, preparing them for life’s broader challenges. 

Create Positive Short-Term Goals: A decision not to extend a contract can bring feelings of rejection, lack of self worth, worry about the future. Find things that you can engage you child in outside of football to help rebuild their confidence. This might be other sports, time with friends or family, doing a new activity to give them a break and remind them of their other strengths and positive aspects of their life 

Impact on Parents and Family 

1. Coping with the Emotional Strain  

 Release can feel like a loss for parents, too. Seeing your child disappointed and not able to continue with their football at a particular club can bring feelings of rejection and loss. As a parent, the sudden change to the structure of your day, the friends and relationships with other parents and the sense of injustice that can be felt can have a real toll on parents and families.  It’s essential to manage your own reactions to model resilience and to avoid overwhelming your child with your emotions also think about how you communicate with the club about the decision and how you share with others

2. Build a Support Network 

Not everyone will be able to help their child through the next steps. Take time to reflect on what you can offer, and what others might be able to provide.  Find a community of other parents or professionals who understand. This might be through reaching out to parents who have been through a similar experience or parents in your group who you know will be supportive. You can also find support from the wider community of parents in academy football through www.No1Fan.club. For some people they may have other industry professionals who can advise and support. 

3. Plan and Reflect 

Discuss exit support with the club and how they can support you and your child with the next steps. Allow yourself time to regroup, discuss options, and move forward with a clear plan. Having structure and steps you are going to follow can just help to keep you moving forward when it can feel overwhelming. 

Next Steps: Practical Tips for Finding a New Club 

1. Keep Communication Open with Your Club   

 Ask the club to send out clips, CVs, and updates on your child’s behalf. Do regular reviews of this information to reflect growth, testing scores, new clips and ask the club to resend or send it out yourself. Follow up with clubs that your child’s information has been sent to, ask the club for the list so you can follow up with key clubs and keep your child top of people’s minds. 

2. Finding a New Club 

Be prepared to get in touch with clubs directly to find out what opportunities there are. With 20 Premier League clubs and over 92 clubs in the football leagues from Championship to National league it can feel overwhelming to know who to contact. Think about different things that might be important to you and your child and develop a list of clubs to contact to follow up on the communication sent out to them. You might want to select clubs with highly recommended academies, clubs that are close to your home, clubs with proven track record of academy graduates making the first team, clubs that support a varied education programme, or clubs that have specific style of play, ethos. 

Emailing them to follow up on club contact can help put spotlight on your child’s details, ask about their scholarship process and whether they are looking for particular positions or whether they are holding any trials or exhibition games. You may not hear back from them all but there are many examples of people who have responded to this type of follow up contact. 

Some families are drawn to prestigious clubs, and what will be important is being in the highest level club but it’s often better for a player to be somewhere they’ll receive the game time and development they need. Players may benefit more from a club that truly values them, rather than one where they may sit on the bench or struggle to fit in. 

3. Prepare for Trials and Next Steps 

 Research clubs and academies well. Trials are competitive, so having confidence in your knowledge of clubs’ expectations, ethos, and pathways is helpful. Doing multiple trials can mean more rejection for your child and a need for significant resilience, make sure you have talked to your child about whether they want to do this and keep checking in with them. For some children it can just be too much to keep turning up at new places and be unsuccessful.  

 
For players taking GCSEs, balancing school commitments with trials can be challenging. Traveling for trials can lead to missed school days and limited time for studying, which adds stress for both players and families. Planning trials around school holidays leaves you with limited time so be cautious of clubs that want to lock your child into long trial contracts, as these can restrict their ability to trial elsewhere. Trial papers sometimes limit players to one club for up to eight weeks, potentially missing out on other opportunities 

 
Instead of multiple one-off trials, consider exhibition games or training days organised by clubs. These events often gather multiple scouts from various clubs, allowing your child to be seen by more recruiters at once.  

During trials continue with your research, talk to parents find out about the club and remember it is not just your child on trial so ensure you also model respect and resilience. As an U16 you will be offered an opportunity to register on an exit trial. Remember that that these are huge events where large numbers attend and only a few children are selected. Don’t invest too much in this process, ensure you have explored other trial opportunities, exhibition games etc 

  Trials can be exhausting and emotionally draining, so it’s crucial to keep an eye on how your child is handling the process. If possible, prioritize trials that they’re likely to succeed in first, and arrange others in an order that keeps them motivated. Don’t rush decisions if you have other trials lined up—taking time to explore options might even prompt quicker responses from clubs. 

3. Consider Alternative Pathways 

Private academies, non-league or grassroots football can offer a strong foundation to build back confidence and for many this has been the road back into professional pathways. If your child is without a club, keep them active to maintain their readiness and connection to football. Think about how they will keep fit, get game time and work on improving their game so they are ready for opportunities that come. 

For some players, while it might not seem it at the time, leaving a club or leaving football can be relief, especially if they were finding it particularly difficult for example not settling in to the new level of football, or coming to the realisation that football isn’t for them. For some children they may not know how to communicate that feeling without worrying that they are letting other’s down. Make sure you are listening to what your child really wants. 

New start 

Moving to a new club often means relocating, which can be especially challenging when joining as a scholar. Many players live with host families, which requires adapting to a new home, routines, and support network. Encourage your child to communicate openly with their host family, as building a strong relationship can make this transition smoother. 

Integrating into a new team can be both exciting and intimidating. Sometimes the team are all new players and other times your child might be one of only a few joining. Help your child see this as an opportunity to build relationships, not just with fellow players but with coaches and support staff too. Encourage positive interactions, humility, and a team-first mentality, as this will help them feel more connected and accepted by their new peers. 

Moving to a new club and city, adapting to a host family, and joining a fresh team can be emotionally overwhelming. Checking in regularly with your child is crucial to understand how they’re coping. Remind them that it’s natural to feel homesick or unsure initially and that leaning on their host family, teammates, or club mentors for support is encouraged.  

 
Joining a new club as a scholar is a significant step. Remind your child that it’s okay to feel uncertain but that they should focus on making the most of this experience. Show them how to embrace the change with resilience and positivity, which will help them grow both as a player and an individual in this new chapter. 

Understanding the Business of Football 

1. Recognising Football as a Selective Industry  

   Football is intensely competitive, and while talent is essential, many decisions are influenced by factors beyond a player’s control, such as club politics, agent relationships, and scouting connections. Clubs make choices behind closed doors, often based on long-term strategies, and not every decision is immediately understandable from the outside. Developing resilience is vital for both parents and players to navigate these uncertainties with patience and focus. Embracing this reality helps families stay grounded, so they can work within the system, rather than against it. 

2. Working with Agents 

 While agents can be instrumental in navigating the football landscape, it’s often unwise to rush into an agent relationship after a contract is ended. When a player is released, clubs may not show immediate interest, and agents might not prioritise players who are not currently contracted. Instead, use this time to build genuine, direct relationships with coaches, clubs, and industry contacts, which can provide far more value in the long term.

If finding an agent is a priority the make sure you understand how they operate, the questions to ask, and do your background research. If you want to know more about working with an agent, attend our workshop or book a 1:1 support call, and we can share our experience in the area.

Gaining an understanding of how the industry works and developing these connections may ultimately help your child make better, more strategic choices. 

3. Staying Humble and Building the Right Identity  

 In the football world, humility and character matter as much as skill. Clubs often look for players who will be positive influences on and off the pitch. Reputation is everything, and maintaining a respectful, grounded attitude can set your child apart. Encourage them to view themselves as part of a team and a larger system, and especially when trialling think about how they might be perceived on and off the pitch. These values, along with resilience, go a long way in building a strong, respected identity that may open doors in ways talent alone cannot.   

Remind your child that the football industry isn’t always logical or fair, and sometimes others may get opportunities that seem undeserved. Encourage them to stay focused on their path, knowing that the only place they truly control is the pitch. 

4. The Power of Relationships 

 Building and maintaining relationships is essential in the football industry. From sideline conversations with coaches to interactions with scouts and club staff, every interaction contributes to your child’s professional network. Clubs often seek players whose families show understanding of the system and avoid public criticism or aggressive behaviours. Demonstrating a positive, supportive approach not only models resilience for your child but also sets a foundation for long-lasting relationships in the industry. As the football journey progresses, this network can prove invaluable in finding new opportunities, learning about potential club fits, and navigating the complex, selective nature of the football world. 

Final Thoughts: Defining Success Beyond Football 

Only a small percentage of academy players will go on to play professionally. Supporting your child through the highs and lows—while fostering a balanced identity, resilience, and adaptability—will prepare them for a fulfilling future, both on and off the pitch.

No1Fan.club wish you and your family all the very best with the next chapter in this life journey.